Chapter 3

The story of an old addict to this kind of confessions to hisself. This will be the 3rd stage that i've been on in this borrowed city. A brand new life, with a slight different set of rules. I'm about to try to change in a way that i've never tried before. Not talking about any of the projects of my associations, i'm talking about putting myself first in my list of priorities for the first time in years.

Trully, i'm very affraid of going on with this trough, getting rid of all this sand that has been accumulating around my bear feet and simply leave this estate. This 2nd chapter was preaty good, but it's coming to an end. I can't linger on it, i must prepare myself to embrace, what feels like a dramatic change.

I always have to keep in mind, "Remember of the constalation of the lion under the white tree with those 5 marks engraved!"

Keane - Nothing In My Way

Never looking back

How much I wanted to be like that.. Remembering of the past, focusing in the future, stuck between two different wave leghths that aren't quite mine at this point, trying always to make them as much part of my life as i possibly can. Ahead comes the unkown, behind comes the obvius truth, here is the noisy time machine from a sci-fi programme, that dosen't allow myself to be in another timeline than this one here, where i feel somehow unconfortable.

This symetry in my mind is a cold prove that all mt toughts are not making as much sense witten as they were in my confused and sleepy mind. Wondering of all of this stones are a part of my stupid little thoughts! The new and the newest are allways a part of me, than this awfall silence that i feel rising inside of mt skin, trying to reach out into my atmosphere.

I've always declared myself to be an enemy of this kind of silence. Just one more day combating it in every single chance that i get, i won't go down so easilly!

Saliva

Your saliva, what private matter to be passing around, so full of germs, bacterias and viruses.. but still i long to be touched by your stupid saliva.. How much i miss to be tuched by your filthy, dirty and unholly saliva! I should fear it, for all it could cause me. Being a part of what caused and causes me to think unracionally, and i keep on dreaming of it, longing.. desiring it..

So mad that i find myself thinking like a small child with its first crush. How can i tell you that my head fancies you, but my heart is still offering so much resistence? Should i simply give up? I ought to be more persistent in this heart affairs! But how can i be more than nothing? How can i fall in you with this lack of saliva that i encounter right here? Still expecting for the future, always hoping to never look back.

Have i told you latetly

So many days that have passed by and you feel like it's yesterday. 'til this awfull day comes and you realised that you've been stuck in time for a while now, and this ungratefull feeling fills you up and you just need to break free of this miserable cycle.

Wondering how, dreaming of what it could be, wishing for the present never to pass you by. I'm missing the future to be. Stupid river of expectations that leads to that desert of sand and sorrow.. Where are those maps that pin point those amazing oasis that colour you up and give birth to fantastic forms of life in your mind?

Death is always present everywhere, in every person one day or another. I'm just sorry about all those magnetic things that still trap me into the metal of the fabric of your dreams

Emily Haines & The Soft Skeleton - Our Hell

fotos

Pedaços de momentos no tempo perdidos, que permanecem congelados numa pasta à espera de serem revisitados com um duplo clique de um rato qualquer mecânico.

Existem por vontade expressa e assertiva de um dedo de um fotógrafo, parasitam as emoções dos observadores do evento, alimentam-se dos mais puros sentimentos e usam-se dessa ligação porca para se tentarem imortalizar.

Amadas por poucos, odiados por muitos e cobiçadas por várias pessoas.
Saudosismo, tristeza, indiferença, alegria, paixão, amor, tantos são os sentimentos coleccionados e por elas transmitidos. Para sempre farão parte da nossa vida...

Ligações

Tudo é finito, há sempre um limite, um fim e um gigantesco principio. Inicio esse ansiado por todos e esperado por quase ninguém. As ligações são feitas de actores químicos presentes em todas as células humanas, conscientes ou não dessa realidade um pouco absurda.

Curvas ligando os círculos celulares de todos os seres com um simples toque, com um mero olhar. Com uma simples vocalização essas curvas são formadas, entrelaçando-se, uma rede é definida e formatada diante dos nossos olhos. E é também com essa mesma velocidade que se vai dissolvendo e deixando espaço desejado para as novas ligações na nossa vida.

Tantas foram, tantas são e tantas serão as ligações ao longo do nosso tempo na superficie deste planeta telúrico, anseio, vivo e recordo todas elas com uma simples e ortodoxa saudade.