This is the period before christmas and it's kinda weird for me, spending it without my family and the normal traditions and foods that I so love.
The big familly dinner and exchange of presents will have as a substitute, something incertain. It's something that has been a part of my life in the last 6months, uncertantly, more that ever in my life and it is kinda creeping me out.
I don't know how to mesure it nor how to cope with all of it, I gess I've been just ignoring the problem so far until this point. It has been the most weird 6months in my life, doing something that was kinda in my wildest plans, but never thinking of doing it. Sometimes I still wake up and think, did I really moved to this new strange country with all its traditions and people?
A lot of times I fell frustrated, I wake up thinking, why do I am really doing in here? Is this experience helping me? Am I doing anything relevant? What's the point of all of this hours? All of this investment of my side or my parents in this? Is it going to be helpfull in the future?
Other days I fell with an energy that I identify myself with, when I fell that I'm capable of doing whatever and have the strength to face the world by myself to achieve something. Those days seem to come less and less in the past months, but my personality keeps on pushing thougth those clouds of incertenty of selfdoubt and stupidity. Today is a good day to be a perfect day, i hope :P